To The Mom…

Today we reached a much desired milestone with Kennie.  She has been waking every 3 hours at night since she was born and in the past 2 months has been getting harder and harder to settle during those late night feedings.  About a month ago we tried to let her cry it out and after an hour of her screaming I realized she just wasn’t ready.  Last night I gave it another try and it worked like a charm.  She only cried for about 20 minutes at 1 am and then another 10 minutes around 5 am and then slept till 8:45 am. 
 
As I was reflecting on how excited I was to have finally had some sleep (I haven’t had more than 3 hours of sleep in a row in over 6 months) I thought about all the worry I went through with Gavin since he was my very first baby.  There are so many things that I wish I had known so I thought I’d pass on some of the things I have learned along the way to a couple of you moms out there.
 
To the Mom that thinks she will ruin her child if she doesn’t do “sleep training” at 3 months old:
Your child will learn how to fall asleep on their own, I promise.  You will not ruin them by rocking them to sleep.  Do it as long as they will let you.  Pretty soon they will not want to stay still for anything so hold and snuggle and love them all you want.  You will not be rocking your 17 year old son to sleep…probably lol.
 
To the Mom who is afraid to let their child “cry it out”:
If you are finding yourself at the end of your rope, do it and as hard as it is to hear your sweet baby cry for you, stay strong and give it a little time.  You will know if your baby and you are ready for it.  And if you and your baby find it’s not working, is OKAY to abandon ship and wait and try again later. 
 
To the Mom who is afraid to speak up about her intuition:
You are the Mom, you know your child better than anyone else.  You may be intimidated by the Dr.s who have years of schooling, but your gut feeling can not be learned.  It is the voice in your head, although quite and small it is wise.  LISTEN to it!  Do not be afraid to speak up and fight for your child.  Are you worried to bring your baby in to the Dr. cause they will think you are a hypochondriac, who cares!  Are you worried about the development of you little one, but don’t know what you can do about it?  Reach out for help, use your resources.  Facebook is like having a village of supporters just waiting to lend a hand to a mama who is in need.  Your job as your child’s mother is to be a warrior, fight for them…at all costs.
 
To the Mom who occasionally (or not so occasionally) feels like she is losing the battle called “being a parent”:
Feel defeated, feel sorry for yourself, feel overwhelmed, feel like a failure…but only for a minute.  You are human, not super woman.  TRUST me when I say, we have ALL been there and we will all be there many many times again.  Call a friend to vent, put the baby down in the crib for a couple minutes (even if they’re crying), go to the gym or Target…do what you have to do to regroup.  You can do it, but you can’t do it perfectly and that is okay.
I have to keep telling myself this.  It so much easier said than done.  We spend so much time worrying about all of the things that can go wrong . . .
This quote relates so perfectly to parenthood for me.  Sometimes I am so bogged down with the task of parenting that I forget how much I love being a parent.  Remember you are not alone, remember you may not be perfect, but you are the perfect Mother for your children.  There is no one on earth that is better suited to love your children.  You got this!
 

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Comments

  1. Amen. And yay that you are finally getting some sleep!

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